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A Blog Called Everything

I'm a 20 year old cisgerendered, bisexual, polyamorous, sex-positive female. I'm anti-rape, pro-queer rights and love cats. (General trigger warning).

Posts tagged "porn"

It’s highly flawed to talk about the impact of “pornography” on young people as if it were a monolithic entity. Of course there is some porn which contributes to the general objectification of women in visual media. Some porn is misogynistic, tasteless and dehumanising. But to tar all sexually explicit content with the same brush shows a woeful ignorance of what’s out there. A lot of porn is pro-woman; even more is pro-human, quite simply a celebration of real human sexual expression without any strong bias either way.

Pandora Blake (porn, like sex work, defies easy generalisations | Spanked, Not Silenced)

(via sexisnottheenemy)

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I had an arsenal of stupid resolve when I came in [to porn]. I was against more than one dick in a scene, and against facials, and against degradation and things that I was told were degrading. I’ve since decided that the most degrading thing of all is being told by strangers that they have a better sense of when I’m being degraded than I do.

Kayden Kross on degradation

(via sexisnottheenemy)

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[J]ust because some men commit rape doesn’t mean all other men are only restrained from it by the artificial strictures of society. In fact, the fantasy of a hyper-willing female partner, one who is both exceedingly desirous of sex and exceedingly satisfied by a man’s skills, is common in both porn and pop culture. A few current videos on XTube, for instance, include Climax2000, Cuming [sic] For You, Debbs Dark Desires, and Wanting Some Big Dick, all of which appear to depict women in various states of hunger-for-your-cock. Of course, Debbs Dark Desires may depict more what dudes want Debb to want than what she actually craves, but the point is that even quite male-centric depictions of female sexuality often include not just consent but enthusiastic desire and orgasm. The idea that men’s natural instincts are rape-centric isn’t supported even by media that serve their most private predilections.

Is Rape Natural?

(via sexisnottheenemy)

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You have so many men, and women, making assumptions based on your movies about what normal or hot sex looks like. What does it feel like to be influencing the way that people have sex? That’s way more responsibility than I want. We do stuff for the camera, we are having sex for the people at home, so not necessarily everything that we do feels good. I once did a magazine interview where they asked me for tips on how to have sex like a porn star and one of my biggest pieces of advice was, don’t.

James Deen (A male porn star speaks)

(via sexisnottheenemy)

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Porn vs the real world II

Part 1: http://a-blog-called-everything.tumblr.com/post/13750266215/a-copy-of-porn-vs-the-real-world
Porn World: A woman and man are fooling around. The man initiates penetrative sex, or some other sex act. The woman says "No. Don't." The guy says "Come on. You know you want to." and does not stop what he's doing. The woman changes her mind and the two have sex.
Real World: When the woman says "No," that's exactly what she means (unless she and her partner have discussed this scenario beforehand and therefore have a safe word that really does mean "No") and if the man continues, he is sexually assaulting/raping that woman.
Porn World: Eyes on the camera.
Real World: Eyes on your partner.
Porn World: People see sex as an end in itself. The goal is orgasm.
Real World: Some people see sex as a means to express love for one another. The goal is intimacy.
Porn World: Penetration is the entire point of sex. You get past everything else quickly--except maybe the oral sex part for him--to get to banging, which should last as long as possible.
Real World: PLEASURE, not penetration, is the point. Penetration is great, but when it goes on for too long, women can get sore. It also doesn't involve direct stimulation of the clitoris, so while it's pleasurable, it may not be her favorite.

Chat

Sex-positivity is the belief that sex and sexiness are… okay. It’s the belief that people shouldn’t be judged by the sex they have. It’s the belief that consent matters and social norms do not. It’s the belief that porn and erotica are valid media of expression (not that the current porn industry is hunky-dory, cause it’s not) and that sex work ought to be just work (not that it currently is). It’s the belief that neither “slut” nor “prude” should be an insult. It’s the belief that every sexual and gender identity is valid.

(via )

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I have days like this ;)

(via tu-absurda-cenicienta)

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It took me almost three years of being sexually active, as well as many years of masturbation to learn how to orgasm. I found that this lead to a lot of insecurity amongst my male sexual partners about not being able to make me orgasm. They seemed to expect it to be easy, like it is in porn.

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Asker

Anonymous Asks:

<p>“The vilification of porn is a massive pet peeve of mine.” My post was not intended to vilify porn, simply to point out that if people base what they they think is normal in terms of sex, sexuality and gender on porn, they are going to be very confused, disappointed and insecure. I love porn and have no objection to people watching it, but I do object to the lack of comprehensive sex education. I regret not adding a commentary in the first place, but I have now if you wish to read it.</p>

a-blog-called-everything

a-blog-called-everything Said:

If anyone ever base what they think is normal in terms of ANYTHING based on movies they’ve seen, they are going to be confused, disappointed, and insecure. Porn has nothing to do with sex education. You’re talking about being able to differentiate between fantasy and reality.

You be surprised how much fiction can influence our perceptions of reality. The media, including porn, often helps to perpetuate cultural myths. It can be really insideous.

This yahoo question is the perfect example of things I see on the internet all the time:

My penis is 3” flaccid and 5.5” when erect, in length. Is this small? When I watch porn their penis seems at least twice as large, particularly their girth, whereas my penis looks to be very small indeed when I look at it but they’re the fairly accurate measurements…

When I research on the Internet everything tells me differently on penis size. So I’d like some views and opinions from ‘normal’ people and perhaps share their penis size to make a comparison if possible…

There are plenty of other examples. Betty Dodson, a well known sex educator, for many years thought her genitals were deformed because her inner labia were long.

When people don’t talk about these things there can be a lot of shame around asking or blind acceptance, so a lot of people get their sex education indirectly from entertainment rather than actually being informed.

There are all sorts of myths we internalize about what is normal, without ever questioning, until something prompts us to.

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Ciscentrism SUCKS!: Dear everybody who helps make/post porn with trans people: →

Stop third-gendering us. Trans women are women. Trans men are men.

Stop reducing us to our genitals. Trans women are women even if they have penises. Trans men are men even if they have vaginas. Nonbinary people are whatever they say they are regardless of genitals.

If you’re…

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